Feel the urge to runaway

It’s not easy to explain

How it is to live with pain

 

I’m not close to being death

But still I have to catch after every single breath

 

My problems isn’t physical, but mental

life has never been, or will be very gentle

 

I try to hid it – I try to lie

I’m living, but actually all I want is to die

 

I’m afraid to see the facts in my eyes

The fact that happiness may never arrive

 

I live anger – I live in grief

Because life isn’t what I thought it would be

 

I often feel like giving up,

for god to turn my soul in to dust.

 

I only see tears and mistakes

So I keep dreaming of a better place.

 

But I won’t let my fear

Controle my actions, so that’s why I’m still here 

 

Still I try to keep fighting

to find the joy of living 

 

Try to appreciate the privileged of giving, 

not just the pleasure of having.

 

I have so many regrets

But I try to do my absolutely fucking best

 

 I really just hope one day

I don’t feel the such urge to runaway.

 

I know is doesn’t exist, there si no chance

But still I keep dreaming to live in a wonderland.

 

– Julie Duch Lauridsen